I had a weird idea about two weeks ago to take a break from the internet.
A lot of people take time off from browsing the internet; they go read a book, work on a hobby, clean the house, go on a vacation, join a cult, get sent to prison, you know...stuff like that. They don't think a lot of it because they actually have active social lives, friends to spend time with, kids, jobs that keep them busy, and things they are actually accomplishing, so to them the internet is just another thing in their lives. It has become a tool they use to get news, read product reviews, shop for those products, order pizza, look at Lolcats, send emails home to their parents, check movie times, a million and one things that enhance their lives that they spend away from the internet. To them, the web has become a part of their lives that enhances it and makes it better, a way to lead a fuller life.
I'm not that type of person. The internet is my life.
I guess I should describe what my day is like so you can understand how it is my life. I usually wake up later than I intend to every morning because I spent way to late on the internet or computer; those are separate things that I'll explain later. I rush to shower, put on make up, and get dressed. The most unnecessarily long part of getting ready is putting on my socks and shoes. I start to put on my socks and glance up to check on whats on the front page of my favorite website Reddit. I usually end up clicking a few links and read some of the comments there, responding to replies to some of my comments (in fact, as I type this blog post, it dawned on me to check to see if this guy responded to one of my comments and I went off to check...he hadn't). It honestly takes me about five minutes to put on my socks and shoes. By this point, I'm already running late for work so I barely have time to take the dogs out so I hustle them outside to smoke a morning cigarette quickly before I run them back inside, grab my stuff and head out the door. Depending on how interesting the last post I read was is how much time I have to rush by and grab something to eat on the way. I get to work with a few minutes to spare and immediately log into my computer and immediately get to work. While I'm trying to eat my breakfast I work my little job unlocking people's passwords and checking websites out between actually having to do my job.
We have a lot of down time at work so I get ample time to browse the web. I read the latest crap on the Huffington Post and yes, the HuffPo is crap. No seriously, it's a liberal Drudge report with better graphics with a dash of Perez Hilton celebrity/Apple obsession. I read it mostly as a form of masochism. I read my web comics, maybe some NPR, browse for job listings, shop for things I can't afford, and then head back to Reddit. I do this the whole day when I'm not working. It's almost compulsive. I can't not do it. I click on the same posts over and over, scan comments for things I want to reply to, check to see if anyone has responded to me, over and over and over. During breaks I think about things I just read, things I want to say to someone in reply, or day dream about things I just read and return to my desk to do it again.
I get off work then go home and watch all the YouTube videos I couldn't at work and the NSFW stuff. I usually spend an hour doing this. At that point my two roomies have come home and I take the dogs out and go smoke with them. I try to cook a dinner that I can throw in the oven and walk away from to go read more posts, more news, more videos, browse for things, over and over. I usually burn stuff because I forget it or get busy and don't want to interrupt my train of thought. Back at my desk while I drop crumbs onto my keyboard I keep browsing, or maybe by this point I have started playing a game on the computer. I play an MMO called Lord of the Rings Online, and offline games as well. This usually happens until almost midnight every night with breaks for more soda and to use the bathroom. This is my workday life, take work out and replace it with more time on the internet and you get the idea of what a weekend is like.
I have been like this for years.
I hate it.
I'm 33, I've been single for five years, I'm underemployed, undereducated, out of shape, broke, haven't gone anywhere other than the gas station or grocery store in about 3 months, and generally not happy with my life. What the hell happened to me? What have I missed out on? Why do I know I am all these things but have done so little to do anything to change it? Because reading the internet is easier than doing anything about it.
That's where this idea came from. What the hell could I be doing instead of sitting in front of a glowing rectangle?
Well, I'm going to find out.
And maybe fix my life a little.
